June’s Inspiration - Between Ignorance and Enlightenment

A Life of Gratitude and Grudges

Some ask, "What is the relationship between people?" The answer is, "It is simply a life of gratitude and grudges!" A family of blood relations can turn into enemies over personal advantages and the family fortune. The intricacies of their gratitude and grudges can be as complex as a soap opera. Theirs is indeed "a family of gratitude and grudges." Within an organization, workers share common ideals and goals. But in fighting over promotions and opportunities, they become shrewd and competitive with each other, thus turning themselves into "an organization of gratitude and grudges."

The residents of a country can come from the same region, school, profession, or ethnic background. Yet some choose to attack or even kill each other. Amidst their constant fighting, they make themselves "a nation of gratitude and grudges." Countries throughout the world should be able to coexist in peace, help one another in times of trouble, and be friends with each other at all times. But hundreds of thousands died in World War I, and millions died in World War II. And there may be a World War III, or even a World War IV. We are living in "a world of gratitude and grudges!"

Reflecting on Chinese history and its dynasties, one will observe that violent discord as a result of hatred was not uncommon. Or, even when gratitude should have been repaid with kindness, it was repaid with battle and war instead. In the course of their never-ending fighting, friends became enemies, and vice versa. Consequently, there was no truth, no reasoning, and no trust between them. The history books are filled with nothing but page after page of gratitude, grievances, and grudges.

Actually, the gratitude and grudges of life need not be so clearly defined. In defining such, we should ask ourselves, "Will this distinction bring us success?" A Chinese scholar once said, "We should not forget those who benefited us and should know those who bear a grudge against us!" Therefore, we need to resolve all grudges.

The Buddha teaches, "To cease hatred with hatred is like trying to cool off a boiling pot by simply stirring it." But if we resolve a grudge with benevolence, then there is nothing that we cannot accomplish. A Chinese classic, The Book of Odes, states, "One should return a plum when given a peach." We should have the virtue of "repaying a drop of kindness with a gushing torrent of gratitude." In dealing with others, we have to learn to forget old grudges. By not carrying over any grievances to the next day, there is nothing that we cannot resolve in our so-called "life of gratitude and grudges."